if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
