are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
