I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
