How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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