Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
