It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
