Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize