I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
someone owes me an orgasm
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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