I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
