you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize