one two three fourrrrnication!
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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