North Korea, Best Korea!
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
