I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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