You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
