Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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