Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
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