well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
soo... how was my night?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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