Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
