Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
