Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
