SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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