I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
