Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
