She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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