you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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