nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I am one with the molecules
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
