u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
