I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
