great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize