im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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