Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize