I can tuck mytits in my pants
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
