Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Randomize
