Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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