There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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