Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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