so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
