My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
