Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
