Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize