it hurts more in the daytime
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
