hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I know her cup size but not her name....
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