Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize