Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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