He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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