Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
