the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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