I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
