we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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