Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
