Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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