you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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